Lets have a real talk about public speaking

wpid-20150427_151853.jpg TLDR: No matter how I prepare, I can't help but want to curl into a tiny ball and pretend the earth doesn't exsist.

full outfit

I have a problem, and that problem is centered around not being able to give a presentation to more than 3 people who I don't know without falling apart.

I had to give a presentation on flute basics at Uni for the year below me. Now it's safe to say that I know quite a bit about basic flute stuff (at least you'd hope so considering it's been my primary instrument for like 12 years (side note, my god that's a long time. If my flute was a child, they would be in year 6 D:)). I'd been rehearsing what I was going to say, and felt fairly confident that this would be the day that I can confidently talk without feeling awful because this subject is my jam yo!

hair bow crystal glasses

I was quite wrong. I mean, I said everything I needed to, and I'm pretty sure I explained things fairly well, but I was feeling like a bit of a mess afterwards.

I think the weirdest thing is that this doesn't extend to performing or rehearsing. Put me in front of a class full of kids with some instruments, sheet music and a baton, I can talk confidently for years. Take away that rehearsal environment, I have absolutely no hope.  Likewise, if I'm in a performance setting introducing a piece of music is the most nerve-wracking part of the exercise.

 

 

Taking off my tartan jacket

It's funny, I never had this fear as a child, in fact I used to love giving presentations right up until my senior years of high school (my english teacher kind of ruined all of the english things I used to be good at/ love doing except reading books)

Twirling the pirate skirt

The fact that it takes me out of my comfort zone is the reason I do these things. The direction I'm looking at taking at the moment is centered around academic stuff, and part of doing all the academic stuff is doing both formal and informal presentations. I figure the only way to get over it is to keep on doing it despite the way I feel.

In other news I did the thing and made a facebook page for my blog! (It'd be super cool if you could go like it and stuff. Even cooler if you shared it!) As well as posting my blog posts there, I'll also share other photograph type things I do, feminist stuffs, probably quite a bit of music and maybe the occasional unsexy selfie.