Vintage Peter Pan

According to one of my students I look like peter pan in this outfit. I like the challenge of gender, but I'm feeling more Captain Cook (with my frilly sleeves and pirate skirt) than Pan. 

I wore this outfit to a button collective gig, and then to school the next day. I've not worn the blouse for a while, and I actually felt fresh and inspired by the outfit (instead of feeling like I was wearing a uniform) 

So the gig I played with the Button Collective wasn't just ye olde run of the mill mid week gig. It was actually a live stream (Which you can watch here!) Being live streamed is really strange. We had a physical audience sitting in front of us, and joining that audience was a bunch of cameras, which created a digital audience as well, but one that we weren't aware of until after the event had passed. 

Lets leave the life stuff for a bit and talk about tights for a second. Specifically sheer tights (This little rant may have been spurred on by Annika Victoria's latest Video). As you've probably noticed I wear a lot of tights. I have many different patterns, colours and textures in my collection and all of my tights that aren't sheer last forever. 

Sheer tights however rarely survive more than two or three wears before they become holy and ascend to heaven. I don't know if anyone else has this problem, but my tights alway start their ladders at the toes, specifically my big toe. Now, it may be longer than my other toes, but there's nothing especially sharp about my big toe that would cause tights to ladder. 

Shirt: Thrifted, Skirt Home Made, Belt: Thrifted, Tights: Coles, Shoes: so soft

Shirt: Thrifted, Skirt Home Made, Belt: Thrifted, Tights: Coles, Shoes: so soft

So anyway, after the first wear of a new pair of sheer tights, there's a small ladder and hole by my big toe (which has usually cut off a little bit of circulation my this time) Upon the removal of my shoes I study the ladder, and deem it small enough for the "clear nailpolish trick" (Basically you attack the ladder with clear nailpolish in an attempt to stop it from getting any worse) Usually this lets me wear the tights a couple more times before the ladders spread up the rest of my legs and it's time to mourn the loss. 

Despite this I keep coming back! Probably because of all the pretty awesome unique styles of sheer tights. 

Diamante Teacup Princess

It's been a long couple of weeks yo. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and having a lot of feelings. I've also been falling into the endless stream of "Youtube Beauty Vlogger with calm voice" as a way to get away from the thoughts and feelings. Anyway, whilst my head is in a muddle, my blog posts are probably going to be more photography than wordy. 

The posts are probably going to be a little less frequent as well. (I intended to get this edited and posted thursday last week, but that kind of didn't happen... Oh well) 

I will finish off by saying how great are these tights!? They're covered in jewels AND even though they're thin, they totally didn't ladder on the first wear! :D 

Comfort Greens

(As per usual) life has been a tad hectic lately. I had gigs with the Button Collective in Sydney/Canberra Thursday and Friday, then spent 6 hours on a bus to/from my rehearsal with Shapes. Sunday was a bit quieter as I went landscape painting with Dad (But, for anyone that's not done landscape painting, it requires a lot of concentration/brain power) Here's an ok photo of what I ended up painting

I've actually been doing a boat load of painting recently (particularly over the last few days - I may have been bombarding my instagram with my work :s) 

It's really odd (in a good way) to be able to fully realise the images I can see in my head. I can remember being 5 and having the ideas, but not the fine motor skills to be able to fully realise my ideas. Even throughout highschool my work was pretty hit and miss. Looking back on it, it was a combination of not using the right medium for me, not understanding the medium I was using, and not practicing enough because of the crazy amount of flute I was doing. 

I took an elective in my last year at uni which was called "introduction to 2D studies". It was a pretty non course, but provided me with a valuable epiphany. We were doing a still life on canvas using acrylics, and I kept watering mine down until they were basically behaving like watercolours. Unless it's a 3D project, I pretty much exclusively work in watercolour. 

I love the way watercolour is predictably unpredictable. You don't just put down pigment and have that be the end. You can alter block colours by adding water/pigment to make the colours run. You can revive colours that have already been applied/dried and change their drying pattern. When creating a wash, applying the pigment or the water first creates a ginormous difference. 

I've got two pallets and a couple of tubes that I use for doing the thing. The first good quality watercolours I purchased were the Windsor and Newton Cotman watercolours. Eckersleys was having a sale, and the set was dramatically reduced and came with a whole bunch of "basic" colours. The other pallet I have is full of half pans I've purchased individually (mostly Windsor and Newton, just because that's what my local art supply store stocks). I've also got 2 tubes of wet watercolour and 1 tube of Gouache. I've got a tube of Prussian blue (because it's the colour I use most) and a tube of Daniel Smith Extra fine Interference green (Because it's a sparkly semi transparent duochrome and makes highlight pop). The tube of Gouache I have is white. I use this for details, as it's opaque (white watercolour doesn't yield the same results as Gouache).

Seeing as I've been really happy with the quality of my work, I've made a society 6. I've got a few pieces there already, and have a bunch more I need to digitise/upload. If you want to see my paintings as they're produced, my instagram is where the magic happens! 

Jumper: Thrifted, Shirt: Cotton On Belt: Alannah Hill, Skort: Home Made, Socks: Gifted, Shoes: Dr Martens. 

Jumper: Thrifted, Shirt: Cotton On Belt: Alannah Hill, Skort: Home Made, Socks: Gifted, Shoes: Dr Martens. 

Little green monsters.

Success is a very messy concept. 

There are so many different types, and different levels. There's your own idea of your success, and other peoples idea of what your success should be. 

Then there's the comparisons. How is your success the same/different compared to those other people? Why are they more/less successful than you? Should you be doing things differently to reach their success. Do you even want to? 

As someone who works in a creative field, I tend to think about success a lot (because creative success usually entails getting paid a living wage of some description). I really want to be a performer, so I spend a lot of time doing things to perfect my craft. I also have a lot of creative hobbies. While I love being creative, and thinking about how I can get my art seen/ music heard, I have to be really careful to not fall down the "I'm just as good, so why is (Insert whoever here) getting more attention/getting paid properly to do what they love" rabbit hole. 

Social media makes not comparing creative success really hard. You can literally measure someone's success in numbers. What's more, you can keep rigorous track of your own numbers. Take my instagram feed for example. I'm ashamed to say, at one point I knew exactly how many followers I'd gained/lost at any particular time, and depending on which had happened, I'd either feel content or a bit sad.

I've been working recently on not comparing myself to other people, particularly creatively. It's a recipe for disaster, and usually ends up destroying my own creative output. Instead, I've been focusing on the small successes - Like having a billion gigs, and getting that new technique down.   

I've also been thinking about what I expect of myself vs what others expect of me. I know what I love to do, and it's started to defer a little from the original plan, but will (in theory) end up in the same place. 

TLDR - Comparing your level of success can be bad. TLDR 2 - Rambly blog post is rambly and disjointed.